27 June 2010

I've been thinking...

About blogging.  About what it means to me, and about how the blog community seems to have given me a lot of the support that my in-person relationships really can't.  I can't express everything I'm feeling to the people around me all the time.  I'd be a one note horn.  At the same time, having everyone out here to talk to had made me feel a lot more free about sharing in general.

Thinking about blogging came together because of several different things all at once.

Part one comes from my husband starting his own blog.  He really felt like it was doing me a lot of good, and thought that he could use an outlet himself.  I'm not sure he understands that having all of you out there reading is a big part of what helps.  Knowing I'm not alone.  Knowing that there is hope.  This blog is also a line of communication with him that is sometimes easier than talking.  He reads all of my blog posts, and so I know sometimes when I'm talking about him, I'm also talking to him.  

Part two was reading another blogger's post about how difficult it is for her to read the blogs of people who are pregnant right now, and then reading a post in response.  It made me think about how I feel about the blogs that I read where the writer is pregnant, or parenting.  Some days they're hard to read.  Most day's I'm pretty okay with it.  Part of me is jealous, but most of me is happy for them.  They're the hope part of the blogging world.  Fulfilled hopes, that allow all of us with as-of-yet unfulfilled hopes to look out and see that Yes, it can happen.

Blogging is good for me, and so is reading other blogs.  Even if I sometimes write a post like this one - get distracted - and neglect to post it for a week or two (or three).  I still feel like I did then, and it's all true.  Maybe we all just need to let it out from time to time.

6 comments:

  1. I can't even begin to say how much having a blog has helped keep me sane. I think it's awesome your husband is starting his own blog. I think it really helped Jeff.

    That really sucks about your dreams lately. I've been having weird dreams, but nothing like that. I sincerely hope they get better for you!

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  2. I'm with you on reading the blogs of SAIFs. It makes me hopeful most of the time, but other times, not so much. :-)

    ICLW #41

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  3. I agree too that blogging has been a godsend for me, especially being able to read others stories. That is great that your love started his own blog too - is he ready to share it with us? I would SO appreciate being able to hear the male thinking around dealing with Azoos.

    I also think it is great that he reads your posts. I gave my love the url for my blog, but it doesn't seem that he is reading. I thought for sure that he would, but maybe I ned to actually make it a request. Last night I showed him my new design and he saw that I had a few comments, he seemed so surprised that I had comments, and I told him that I have friends here who have such similar stories to ours.

    I also agree that blogging has helped me be more free and comfortable to share irl. great post Jenni!

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  4. Jenni,

    I know exactly how you feel. This path can be very isolating b/c it seems that even those closest to us don't really understand what this road is like. I'm so glad that you feel as though blogging has been an outlet for you. Hang in there. (hugs)

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  5. I'm bad about keeping up with comments. But it's been amazingly helpful to have a blog, and to read other blogs, and to take this journey one day at a time. Though I currently fall into the "hard to read" category, I so appreciate the support ... especially knowing all too well that I don't have an all-access pass to the happy sorority of pregnant people. A friend had her baby stillborn today at 22 weeks, and I thought, that could be me. Not something most pregnant people think, you know?

    Thank you for sharing your journey with us, Jenny ... even if the road is bumpy.

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  6. This guy is really lucky !

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